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3 months in a row, donations persist. I'm so proud / confused. >>>gen/6363

Open file (8.78 KB 225x225 embarrassed.jpg)
Are you ever embarrassed about liking BBWs? Deckard 07/20/2018 (Fri) 19:20:04 No. 4826
I've been into BBWs for a long time now (almost 9 years) but I'm still not that comfortable with that. Being with a BBW seems like it would be really fun and I think about it a lot, but I would be embarrassed to be seen with one. I know that's stupid and that there's no reason to care what people think as long as you're happy but I still can't get over it. Did you ever struggle with this and if so how did you get over it?
Just do it.

This isn't "just do it and don't care about what people think" it's just do it and you won't be embarrassed.

You're in the mindset of "dating someone overweight is embarrassing" which is easily ingrained into kids' heads from a fat-phobic society IRL. But people do not give a shit about that. You got to force yourself into a "Dating who I want cause I like them is the best" mindset.

Most people won't care, and anyone who makes snide or rude comments about it are being jerks. Eventually (and pretty quickly) you'll go from mild embarrassment to "wow that person was a total jerk"

Only thing hold this back is your fear of taking the first step.
Please dgaf about what other people say
Being with a bbw or even ssbbw (as I am) is the most awesome thing you can do if you're into it
You'll experience all the things you see, read and hear about in real life ;)
Proudly walking with her while holding hands is so great

And every once in a little while you'll find somebody jealously watching you =p

Believe me, you might miss the chance to find the love of your life and fulfillment if you don't go all the way without worries

It I totally worth it
And if some idiots are talking shit
To hell with them, f them big time
Because it's about you and her only :)
Its not like I'm only into BBWs, so I think I'd find fulfillment even if I wasn't with one lol. But it feels bad to be held back by my own fear like this
>>4834
May I ask you how old you are?
Because I guess the vast majority of us has been there at one point of our lifes…

It certainly was a bit hard and sometimes you ask yourself why you are "different"…

I was there too (post 4833 is me) and I can tell you that you will someday overcome that barrier

Instead of feeling insecure you will get that feeling of being proud to walk with your (ss)bbw gf

Just really go for it
You won't be totally happy until you realize you have to just do it

It is so great once you get there

What is there to lose?
Some stupid comments by a few people (most people don't even care or just think witout ever saying something) vs living your life and dreams…

Why care about others when you are happy
It's your life, not theirs

Don't let fears guide you
Follow your heart ;)
I'm 22
find yourself a woman that you respect and shit

if being fat is just one of the things you like about that person, it's a lot less important and nothing to feel embarrassed or pride about

like if a woman got a college degree, is making good money, and carries herself well then damn it don't matter if she fat as hell haha
>>4836
Alright, so I guess you're in the perfect age to get rid of fears that hold you back

I also had those and decided to just not be led by them

I decided to live the life I want no matter what others may think

They don't need to like what I like
And I don't have to listen to them

It's a hard step, maybe you will lose some "friends" on your way, but they aren't worth it if they don't support you

You'll find the right girl and you'll be happy
But you gotta work for it

Just go for it
It seems a lot harder than it actually is, but the reward will someday be the girl of your dreams

The people who really like you won't leave you anyway

And those who do (or make rude comments) aren't even worth a thought =P

You just gotta get that deeply engrained in your head

You don't wanna be held back by fears, well kick 'em in the face
You got this man :)

It's about you
Your life, your decisions, your way
>>4838
How does one "decide" to get over fears and anxieties? That's, like, what makes them fears and anxieties: their inability to simply be "gotten over".
More of a question about this concept in general.
>>4839

Psychotherapy?
Medication?
Not embarrassed at all. No need to be. Do you think any pressure is coming from your family?

The most important thing is that you are happy. There are always going to be haters. Fuck 'em.

Once you get comfortable with someone just focus on them and tune everyone else out. Of course there are going to be ignorant assholes who never fail at staring or making a stupid comment which can affect someone who has self-esteem issues. A lot of people just assume that fat girls are desperate.

Maybe ease into it? Date chubby girls first? Maybe you can find one you can plump up?
>>4844
I like this answer much better than the usual "just don't think about it/get over it/stop giving a fuck" kind of responses.
Nope. Lots of guys like fat girls. And I'm not conceited and I don't have such an absurdly high opinion of myself that I'm ashamed to be with someone that other people might consider less attractive than me.
>>4848

Its the opposite actually. I'm extremely self conscious and pretty much always assume that people are judging me poorly, so being with a bbw would just give them another reason to look down on me.
I am not embarrassed at all about liking BBWs. Compared to some of the weird shit a lot of people are into my interests in full bodied women with big boobs are extremely tame.

However, I am not into feeding, and not too interested in SSBBWs, so I may be a pleb as far as this "fetish" is concerned. I just like fat asses and big boobs and don't mind a little (or a lot) of cushioning in between.
Advice from a middle aged FA: Wish I'd given less of a fuck when I was young. Bottom line is that most people really don't care who you date or marry. I thought my mom was a fatphobe but it turned out she was all talk. (Wound up liking my fat ex more than I did.) If you have friends or family who'll give you shit, get rid of them. If you live in an area with a bunch of rednecks or toxic hipsters who'll give you shit every time you're out, move. Seriously - if you're a real FA it's as non-negotiable as being gay. Openly dating fat women might bring on some stress and sticky situations, but not following your true nature will ensure you'll wind up miserable.
thanks for all the advice
Yeah. It's not about being ashamed of being with a fat person though. For me, it's just embarrassing for people to know about my fetishes, and BBW is so obvious.
I'd be embarrassed to date an ugly girl or a girl with no personality, but not a bbw. I'm typically very, very insecure, but when I've had big girlfriends, I find myself much more confident in public. It's like saying to the world, "this is what I like and idgaf."

That being said, holding out for an attractive BBW with a sharp sense of humor and passionate interests has been a patient process. :/
>>4866
Understandable, and there's really no reason anyone needs to know about your fetishes except a serious romantic partner or spouse. Even then… not necessarily. Most people who know me well know I'm an FA. No one knows I'm into feedism, etc. I know it's the 21st century but I'm okay with private stuff being private.
>>4866
liking fat chicks is not a fetish, if you got hard thinking about flag poles that's a fetish, learn the difference between preference and fetish
>>4875
fat disgusts normal people so yes it is a fetish
>>4875
fat disgusts normal people so yes it is a fetish
>>5305
My friends asked me "Who the hell convinced you that fat is attractive?!" They said an attraction to fat women is not something that happens intrinsically , that it has to come from an external source.
It is the Darwins Theory of Evolution at work. We have been chosen as part of a normal distribution in the population to select mates to rear our offspring, who carry more fat on their bodies. Some of us may prefer apple shaped, or pear shaped, or a mixture. Either way we hanker after fatter, heavier females. They make us want to be with them and have families with them. There is a reason for this, because nature likes diversity. Diversity gives us strength (no I am a Conservative), for when environmental challenges occur onto the population. There maybe famine, an extremely cold winter, or even some illness in the population that will kill some of us in the population off. Fatness may confer some survival advantage when disaster strikes. Nature inherently builds within our genetic make up differences between our DNA and encourages us to seek diversity even if we don't know it. It is why plants try to scatter their seed far and wide, for resources and for mating with our plants with different DNA. So it is perfectly natural to like BBWs and SSBBWs. Some females also find it attractive to make themselves fatter, and find it arousing to overeat or inflate their bellies to simulate being pregnant, and upload their own videos to the internet. Go forth and multiply!
You have to make a choice today. If your harddrive contains more images of BBWs or SSBBWs than of slim women, then you must overcome and accept that you need to be with fatter women. To hell with what others think. The other alternative is that a slim woman is attracted to you and finds it attractive for herself to gain weight.
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Don't be embarrased - there is a youtube video showing a situation where a slim man is dating a BBW and is about to introduce the BBW to his parents. One of the parents makes a jibe about what you like doing - eating? (~Hahaha secretly; Well Duhhhh)! Awkward!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLG4ArsG_ts
Make it WORK. It's OK to be Big!
I can be hard to get over this because society can be so hard on fat people, but at the same time tons of people are in "mixed weight" relationships and get on with their lives just fine. You owe it not only to yourself but also to your future girlfriends to be open about this. After all, what does it say to them about how you feel about them when you're ashamed to be seen with them in public? The best solution here is to take the plunge and find support among the family and friends you know will have your back no matter what. You'll find the courage along the way.
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If you fear that you might get embarrassed, sometimes it's not your own fault if you suffer from anxiety and panic attacks. If that is you, try wearing sunglasses. By not being able to make eye contact puts you in charge of social situations.
>>5315

You soon learn who are the A-holes amongst your friends. Society has kind of dictated skinny is who you should date but fuck 'em, you like what you like. I got to a point with a few people where I thought why am I even friends with you, and by the way, how is it your life and relationship is more bonafide when you are with an oriental girl the size of a 10yr old schoolboy. You get confident in time, if you're already okay in yourself to date a fat girl/guy the confidence will come if you are a little insecure. Most people actually don't give a fuck. The one's that do you soon learn they're not worth bothering with.
Speaking from experience - dated a big girl for 2 years when I was 16 until 19; I was easily at my least self-confident and I was deathly afraid of people figuring out I liked big girls, but when I found someone I loved no matter what, I couldn't have cared less what anyone else thought. It's easy to say that it'll be fine if you start dating one rather than you going out to do it, but I genuinely walked around with pride knowing I was with someone I enjoyed being with.
I probably wouldn't tell work colleagues as they are not always your friends, and you can't always easily avoid them.
I've never felt embarrassed for liking or being with a BBW/SSBBW, but I have feared that my fondness for FA related kinks, such as Feederism and Weight Gain, might cause compilations in future relationships.

I'm basically saying, that I'm afraid of relieving my fetishes to future GFs for fear of repudiation.

So my questions are:
Have any of you ever kept your sexual preferences a secret from your partner for fear of embarrassment and rejection?
And if not, how did you introduce the ideas to your partner and how well did it turn out?
>>5400

My ex tried to appease my fantasies but I'm gonna tell you man, knowing she wasn't really into it didn't do anything for me. She had cushion (5'5, 195lbs) but I always craved more. It's kinda why I broke it off eventually. Sad because she loved me tremendously. But I couldn't stop thinking about bigger. Maybe over time I'll mature and learn to compromise

>>5310
Great comment.

>>5369
Eventually the shit people give you tapers off (they're busy with their own lives), but honestly it never really ends. However, a few of my friends have expressed to me "Man, you'd be the perfect wingman! You get the fat friend and I'll get the skinny one!" I'm a-ok with that. And my buddies usually tell me stories about thicc or bbw chicks they know or see. You have to OWN it, don't be afraid. People can sense when you're embarrassed by it. If you own it they will respect you
>>5460
Yeah. I agree with this. People tend to feel like it’s a bad thing only when you do. If you think it’s awesome, they just figure you know something they don’t.

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